Moms’ Roundtable: Six Perspectives on Baby Led Weaning

If your pediatrician has given the go-ahead to start offering your baby table foods, you may be wondering where and how to start. Baby led weaning (BLW) is one method you can try. While it’s a method many parents like, it can be overwhelming and confusing to navigate at first. We interviewed 6 moms who used BLW either exclusively or in combination with the more traditional approach of feeding purees to find out what worked well, what was hard, and what they’d recommend to parents who are thinking about trying it.

First, some words from the Rooted Willow Community team.

What is baby led weaning, anyway?

BLW is a method of feeding table foods to babies. The word “weaning” confuses some people. In the United States, we typically use “weaning” to refer to cessation of breastfeeding. In other counties, “weaning” usually refers to the introduction of complementary foods. For us in the US, “baby led feeding” is probably a more accurate way to describe it. Whatever you call it, the basic idea is that this method puts baby in charge. Large pieces of food are presented, and the baby feeds themself.

Is baby led weaning safe?

Babies need to reach certain developmental readiness milestones before any solid foods should be offered. Once those have been achieved, the choice of how to introduce table foods is one of personal preference. The major safety concern with feeding babies is choking, and research has shown that BLW does not pose a greater risk of choking than the more traditional method of feeding purees.

Here's what we think all parents should know before trying baby led weaning.

• Choking is different from gagging. Choking happens when food is blocking the airway and can be life threatening. Gagging is a reflex that protects against choking. It is an involuntary response to food touching certain parts of the mouth and throat. Gagging is a normal and expected part of baby’s development as they learn to eat solid foods.

• Babies who do BLW learn to chew before they learn to swallow. Conversely, babies who are fed purees learn to swallow before they learn to chew. Babies need to learn both skills. The order in which they acquire those skills is, in the long run, inconsequential.

• Some feeding “rules” apply to all methods. Guidelines about introduction of allergens, foods that are choking hazards (like hard nuts, whole grapes, etc.), and age-restricted foods (like honey) are important to understand and follow regardless of feeding method.

• When in doubt, rely on resources you trust. We aren’t clinical professionals, and our sentiments aren’t intended to replace medical advice. However, feeding your baby is both a medical issue and a parenting one. There are many great resources out there that can help you decide what’s right for you and your baby.

I decided to do baby led weaning for the convenience of it.

Spoon feeding baby food sounded time consuming. It’s also really convenient to just serve what I cook for the rest of our family. The only special step is presenting it in the way that’s safe for her to eat it. BLW has worked well for both of my girls and for my family as a whole. It gave my daughters the freedom to pick and choose with they eat during each meal. It’s also fun to see what they like best and what they don’t like.

The challenging bit is probably the mess.

And the throwing of food. It’s a good thing we have a dog. I have learned to start off by putting less in front of her. Then I let her ask for more or offer her more food if she eats everything in front of her. This also gave us an opportunity to learn and practice sign language!

We introduced table foods in our own unique way.

We started offering table food when my daughters shows signs of readiness. We practiced with two or three jars of purees and yogurt to get them used to having a thicker texture than milk. After a week or two, we moved on to mashed table foods like avocado and banana. Then we worked our way up to more complex meals and different textures. Pinterest has given me some great meal ideas I probably wouldn’t have thought of on my own, like sweet potato and black bean patties. I do believe that’s not “the way” to do BLW, but it’s what I was comfortable with and worked for us.

My advice to parents considering BLW: research how to prepare the food.

At first I was nervous and lost about how to present the food. Safety is obviously very important. Knowing how to have the food cut up properly will set you and your baby up for success. Gagging is going to happen at first, and that’s completely normal. It doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. Just pace yourself and have fun letting baby explore!

The financial strain of buying baby food seemed stressful.

Plus, with work I didn’t feel I’d be able to commit to making homemade baby food. A friend told me she did BLW where you “just feed them what you eat.” After researching, I was sold! Financially it was a huge savings just being able to feed our kids what we ate. We loved that we didn’t have to pack little meals for our kids everywhere we went because we knew we could just give them some of what we were eating.

The biggest bonus was that we could enjoy mealtimes as a family.

We didn’t have to take turns shoveling food into the baby’s mouth between bites of our own food. It occupied the babies and gave them a chance to be involved in meals the way the rest of us were. We did BLW exclusively with all three of our children once they could sit up independently. We technically broke some of the “rules” because we spoon feed them for our own convenience when it came to food like yogurt, applesauce, or soup.

The most difficult part was judgement from family.

We especially faced pressure to stop from the older generations who believed in putting cereal in bottles starting at 3 months. They didn’t understand why we waited longer to introduce solid food or why we chose to give whole pieces of food rather than cutting everything into tiny pieces.

My advice for parents considering BLW: don't overthink it.

Other moms who used BLW and broke it down for me called it “lazy parenting” because it’s so much easier than using the prepackaged step meals for babies. It became something we loved, that our babies loved, that was basically free and super easy. Just make sure you learn the WHY behind BLW so you know which rules can be broken or bent and which are best left alone. Most importantly, get a dechoking device fit for babies, like The Dechoker. The back blow protocol should work on babies, but it doesn’t always. I have a dechoking device that fits adults and big kids now because I feel like it’s an important thing to invest in.

Force feeding a baby purees sounded messy and miserable.

If we trust a baby to tell us when they’re done with their milk (breastmilk or formula), why would eating solid food be different? I liked that the BLW method allowed my child’s eating to be more self-directed. We ended up sticking with BLW exclusively, but I do want to mention that there is a misconception that purees are not “allowed” with BLW. Mashed or pureed food can still be considered part of BLW if its given on a preloaded spoon and the child is allowed to put the spoon in their mouth.

With BLW, we didn't have to buy separate food for our daughter.

It made mealtimes easier and fostered family time around the table. Plus, so much early on is learned from watching and mimicking. We showed our daughter how to chew by over exaggerating the movements so she could see what we were doing. Although I did batch prepare a few items specifically for my daughter, BLW also challenged my husband and I to try new foods and expand our normal menus so we could offer her a diverse range of food.

Initially the gagging was tough for me.

I would literally sit on my hands to prevent myself from interfering. One thing that helped me feel more comfortable with the gagging was @BabyLedWeanTeam on Instagram. She is a dietician who has done BLW with most of her kids. She regularly shows babies in the first few weeks of eating as well as videos of normal gagging to help parents learn what’s normal. I learned that if your child starts gagging, stick out your tongue. It’s a way to help get food out of the mouth, and babies will learn how to do it by watching your example.

My advice to parents considering BLW: be patient.

Your baby might not eat anything for the first couple of weeks. That’s okay. If they’re playing with food, that’s success. We have to remember that it’s new to them and very strange. And don’t be afraid to season their food! Your baby’s food doesn’t have to be bland. One of my daughter’s favorite foods at 9 months old was curry tofu.

I was introduced to baby led weaning by a friend.

A handful of years prior to having my own kids, I was visiting a friend and watched her using BLW with her daughter. I had never heard of it before, but it seemed right up my alley. Fast forward to my first baby at 4 months old: I tried to give her a spoonful of oatmeal, and she pushed it right out of her mouth. A week later I tried banana, then a week later sweet potato. We had the same result with both. Around the time my daughter was 6 months old, I ran into that same friend at a party. I’d forgotten all about BLW until she reminded me. I decided to give BLW a try, and it worked very well for us. For my second and third children, it wasn’t a question if we would try BLW. By then, it was just a way of life for our family.

My children could feed themselves while I ate my meal at the same time.

I could just sit my child in their chair, put food in front of them, and we could enjoy our food together. I also never had to worry about packing special food for my children when we left the house. I knew that whatever I was going to have for my next meal or snack would work for them as well.

Children are much more capable than adults give them credit for.

They just need to be provided with opportunities to learn. People do not need teeth to chew as our gums are very strong. Grandma and Grandpa who have lost their teeth have no problem eating cheeseburgers! Plus, children’s molars don’t come in until well after they have started eating table foods, regardless if they do BLW or eat purees. I did have to educate others who cared for my children (like family members and childcare providers) that my child could safely eat the food I had provided and that it did not need to be mashed or cut into smaller pieces.

My advice to parents considering BLW: learn the difference between gagging and choking.

Learning the difference between these two is key. As adults we often use the term “choking” when what we are really referring to is “gagging.” They’re not the same. And as to the mess, people have said BLW is messy. I didn’t find it any messier than trying to spoon feed purees to a child who is constantly trying to take the spoon away from you.

I decided to try baby led weaning in hopes that I wouldn't have a picky eater.

I also hoped it would help my child learn to not be sensitive to food textures. It’s worked very well for us – she eats pretty much everything that’s given to her.

Sometimes baby led weaning is not convenient.

If we’re constantly on the go, it can be hard to use BLW. Packing food that works for BLW out of our house is tricky. Plus, since I have to prepare this food, we don’t always have something ready to eat on a moment’s notice. We do a combination of BLW and purees because sometimes it’s just easier to feed pre-made baby food. When we’re out and about or when my baby’s meal time doesn’t line up with family meal time it’s convenient to have something ready to feed her.

Solid Starts was a really helpful resource.

Oddly enough, coming up with a variety of ideas of foods to offer for BLW was challenging. I love using the Solid Starts app because it gives you ideas of what to try and shows you how to serve each different food. It also has a spot to keep track of your child’s likes, dislikes, and reactions to different foods and provides information about allergens and how and when to introduce them.

My advice to parents considering BLW: it doesn't have to be strict.

Don’t be hard on yourself. BLW doesn’t have to be all or nothing. It’s okay to give purees, too. They’re a different texture than whole foods. Eating them, too, helps your baby learn different skills.

With my first two children, we did the traditional puree diet.

I first learned about the BLW method when I was preparing to introduce solids to my third child. I was really interested in letting baby lead the way and use her sense of touch. That isn’t part of the “traditional” way of introducing foods. Allowing baby to work her way through a more raw and organic diet has worked well for us. It has allowed us to align her diet with ours and minimized the number of items we need to serve at meal time. It’s been more convenient to order a side of steamed veggies at a restaurant than to remember to pack purees.

Learning how to cut each food appropriately was overwhelming at first.

I purchased a book, which we used minimally at the beginning. Then I joined a Facebook group called Baby Led Weaning for Beginners and Beyond. That was such a helpful resource! The admins were quick to respond for active mealtime questions. With thousands of contributing members serving hundreds of different foods, the group provided more pictures and infographics than my book did for how to cut each food. I saved them to my phone for quick access when I needed it. Although we eventually felt comfortable with the method, some of our family members weren’t familiar with the appropriate cutting guidelines. Having them help out with meals was sometimes hard. And others who were not familiar with the BLW method were sometimes nervous when our baby tried new foods.

We ended up doing a combination but primarily stuck with baby led weaning.

Ultimately my daughter’s diet was about 80% BLW and the rest purees. She has tried so many foods in a raw, organic way that have made richer memories than just which puree we tried first.

My advice to parents considering BLW: relax and have fun!

Trying new foods is an incredible experience to lead baby through. It’s important to remember that they may love it or they may not, and their preferences can change depending on how the food is cooked, seasoned, and the temperature. There’s a difference between gagging and choking, too, and knowing the difference is important. Trust your gut and do what you’re most comfortable with.